Gone is 2010

This year was such a complicated year for me. A lot has happened, a lot has changed, yet everything is the same. I'm not quite sure I like that! I'm hoping that 2011 will be better. I want to grow more confident, and even if I don't, I want to better face my fears. I want to give myself less excuses for things and I want to love myself better.

I feel like 2010 was a year of friendship. I've met new people and I've also had to say goodbye to some. I never liked having to do that, but I can only hope the people that leave the best in life and that even if we're not friends anymore, I'll keep them in my prayers. No matter how terrible the break up is. Haha. I've never been able to hate someone...and sometimes I wish that I could. But at this moment, I want to be able to rely on myself more and not feel so disheartened and hurt every time someone leaves me. I want to focus more on my goals and less on people who may or may not care about me at all. I want to be less bitter. More optimistic. More hopeful and well. A lot more of everything.

And at 6:04 pm of 12/31/2010, I feel like I CAN do this. I've got friends that I know I can trust...and even then. I feel like maybe I can start trusting myself. I know that 2011 wont make everything alright, and that it wont change everything, but I'll treasure this moment of calm realization and hopefully carry it on through on out the new year.

2011, the year of the rabbit! IT'S GONNA BE MY YEAR.

Happy New Years everyone. Cheers to the future us as we put our past year to rest.

P.S. A convo with momos...

Momos Frühling says (5:23 AM)
OTL
Momos Frühling says (5:24 AM)
i dont want to orz all the time just to talk to you so its better to keep your head on your shoulders 'w'
plus
your bum is fine where it is
and im sure so is your flowerbalcony 'w';

Marimo Buns says (5:25 AM)
m
my flowerbalcony?
are you
referring to my boobs?

Momos Frühling says (5:25 AM)
ID

Marimo Buns says (5:25 AM)
because that's the first time i heard of it like that

Momos Frühling says (5:25 AM)
LOL

Marimo Buns says (5:25 AM)
would you like to fertilize some flowers in my flower balcony? *wiggle brows*

Momos Frühling says (5:26 AM)
seriousfacepalm

AW YEAH. SILLY CONVOS AT 5 AM. Why am I awake.

About that webcomic...

WELL. I started to post it here: @Smackjeeves (which my bro misread as Smackjesus OH LOL BRO)

Here are the first few pages available there (and now here too!)

They're in order! Amazingly! Haha. Recently had some depressing chain of events, but trying hard not to let people in general get to me. Going to grow that backbone now! And stand up for myself. Getting myself pushed around because I'm afraid of hurting someone has to stop. YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT HURTING SOMEONE RIGHT? ...idk. I think I read that in a comic somewhere. (AHAHAHAHAH OH MAN)

GOT ASSASSIN'S CREED 1. I'll play it when I'm not so unfocused. Theres a lot of controls to handle;; I wonder if it's just for the pc version;; Also. Ameruu from Twitter drew me some ZOLU so that actually improved my mood. <3 Link is HERE!

I need to get some damn surface that I can use my mouse PROPERLY on because it moves like a retard over my bedsheets or this cardboard slab I found somewhere in my room. Speaking of room, it needs to be cleaned.

A humorous encounter between my twin bro and my internet tabs via my stupid chat speak.

And...maybe tomorrow I'll have some character sketches for the comic done.

Slowly getting to the list of to-do's

I have this huge untamed beast called a to-do list. It's to the point that I can't contain it within my head soo if I'm supposed to be doing something that you don't think I'm doing (I'M WORKING ON THAT COMMISSION, MILLI, I PROMISE)....maybe drop me a line? Orz''' I need all the help I can get!

Also, I've begun to realize that a lot of people post one or two pieces of art in their posts and it looks so much nicer than sloppy like mine....but heh. Maybe I'll try posting more frequently for a change then.

:( NO POSEMANICS THIS TIME. For shame...I'm also working on a webcomic that I'll withhold from posting its pages here. 8u8

Risa. She's a character belonging to Ingenious Studios and I had to draw her based on their sketch. Was an art test!

A design for a contest Eri has been reminding me about nonstop. Haha. SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG. I kept forgetting. OTL''''

ART AGAIN

Well, now that my tablet is finally working (and photoshop stopped crashing every 5 minutes, too) I got SOME DRAW ON. AW YEAH.

Life drawing. MUST. PERSEVERE. Remember to do these exercises more often, self.